Disfrutar la vida mientras trabajamos | Como ser feliz y disfrutar de tu trabajo | Dale Carnegie

Disfrutar la vida mientras trabajamos | Como ser feliz y disfrutar de tu trabajo | Dale Carnegie

HOW TO ENJOY LIFE AND WORK Techniques for finding pleasure at work and in life and for communicating better with other people Some ways to tranquility If a worker’s blood were analyzed at the end of his day, he would find it full By the toxins of fatigue. If, on the contrary, the brain of Albert Einstein After an arduous day of scientific reflections, it is very probable that it has not been detected None of those toxins. From the physical plane, the brain is tireless; After eight Or twelve hours of starting a task, you can continue to do so well as at first. As JA Hadfeld says in The Psychology of Power, the origin of the Fatigue is mental: boredom, boredom, resentment, the sense of worthlessness, These are the risk factors that affect the performance of the sedentary worker. If you are looking for tranquility and awakening your interest in life, you will It is okay to follow these simple guidelines to ward off the harmful effects of boredom and Nonconformity: Meet and be yourself. Psychologists know this very well: behind many neuroses, many complexes And even the most severe psychotic pathologies, hides one of the greatest tragedies Human beings, that of wanting to be someone and something other than the person that one is. It is one of The greatest causes of unhappiness that, as was said more than a century ago by the doctor James Gordon Gilkey, is a problem as old as the world and as universal as life Human Daily, we meet men and women who strive to imitate others, And in this effort they sacrifice their own authenticity. But do not be too keen to know That no one wants a fake coin. Paul Boynton, who was director of personnel of the Socony Vacuum Company, came to interview more than sixty thousand candidates and, according to him, the Most frequent and most serious error of those who apply for a job is not to be them Instead of acting naturally and being totally frank, they often Give the answers that you think you want to hear. Each individual is something unheard of in the world. It had never happened here and will never come back To pass no one like you. For this reason, if it is a matter of originality, It is enough to explore the difference itself. Like it or not, you can only sing it That is, can only paint what is, can only write what is. So said sir Walter Raleigh: I can not write a Shakespeare book, but I can write a Book of mine For those who would like to be like others or just imitate them, acting as Monkeys, it is worth remembering these other words of Emerson: Envy is ignorance and the Imitation, suicide. Instead of being consumed by the anguish of not being like the others, it’s time To explore their enormous baggage of faculties, many times hidden or wasted. Four good work habits. These four work habits are simple To implement and the effects on your mood and energy will be invaluable: 1. Clear your desktop from all documents, except those related to the problem that You have at hand at that time. The simple vision of a table crowded with papers, documents, To-do reports and unanswered emails can be the trigger for a paralyzing anguish. And as Charles Evans Hughes, president of the Supreme Court of the United States, Men do not die from overwork. They die from scatter and worry. 2. Do things in order of importance. Even if it’s hard to do it or go to Against their tendencies or customs, a good plan to prioritize the most important Is worth much more than improvising on the fly. 3. When dealing with a problem, solve it immediately if you have enough information to take a decision. Account HP Howell, member of the board of directors of US Steel, That there the meetings tended to revolve around endless discussions, after which No conclusion was reached, forcing everyone to postpone the meeting and take Work to their homes. Fortunately, he managed to persuade his teammates to make problems Be addressed one by one, and in each case a decision, without Delays And the result was amazing. From now on, all matters seemed to be resolved At the meetings and it was no longer necessary to carry a pile of reports and a series of unknowns Which would never be solved. 4. Learn how to organize, delegate and supervise. It is true that delegating to the wrong person Can lead to major disasters, but it is even more true that refraining from delegating Is a sure source of worries, tensions and fatigue. The place where you will most easily find young people who have raised Large companies, but have been unable to delegate important responsibilities, Is in the obituary sections of newspapers. Ale] is boredom and avoid fatigue. According to a report in the Archives of Psychology, which chronicles an experiment Led by Joseph E. Barmack, students who were subjected to a set of tests Deliberately bored they felt tired, complained of headaches and arrived Even to get irritated. When evaluating its metabolic processes, it was found that its pressure And their oxygen consumption decreased with boredom, and that the same metabolism Accelerated as soon as the same person began to feel interest and pleasure in the work. In other experiments on fatigue, performed by Dr. Edward Thorndike of Columbia, He kept several young people awake for almost a week, keeping his interest alive in something. The result, according to his own conclusions, is that boredom is the The only real cause of job decline. Note that you rarely get tired when you do something that is very interesting and attractive. Similarly, if you put enthusiasm in your work will combat boredom and, Doing so will reduce fatigue and drive away concerns. Even if your job It seems boring, pretend like it is not and try to find the fun side. Like that kid selling ice cream and instead succumbing to boredom and complaining, Decided to take an interest in the processes annexed to ice cream, and after becoming an expert in Products and chemical processes involved in its elaboration, came to win a contest For college students on the uses of cocoa and chocolate. And so, enjoying a seemingly trivial task, he went on to assume challenges every time greater. It is the same logic of that manufacturer of screws that imposed continuous challenges, Like the amount of screws that would make in an hour, or of that American, salesman to Domicile, which with a very precarious French was dedicated in Paris on sale door to Door, imagining that each time he played a theatrical role before a different audience. If you make it as if you enjoyed your work, then it will be much easier to enjoy it And it will work faster and be more productive. The influence of our form Of perceiving things in real life is not a novel discovery; Marco Aurelio He described it eighteen centuries ago in his Meditations: Our life is the work of our thoughts. If you want to avoid fatigue, which in turn is breeding ground for worries, Also try to rest and relax. According to Dr. Edmund Jacobson, Laboratory of Clinical Physiology at the University of Chicago, any state Nervous or emotional disappears in the presence of complete rest. Learn to relax At work and at home. Let your muscles and your whole body rest. Will not require Greater efforts, for relaxation is nothing other than the absence of all tension and effort. Value what you have. Would you sell your legs or your eyes for a billion dollars? How much would I order for his family? How much for his friends? Add up all the items and check that You are not willing to sell everything you have or for all the richness of The ten largest magnates. Then stop and ask yourself: Why the hell do I care? And you will quickly realize that your motives are insignificant. There is a thousand-year-old phrase to remember: I was sad because I had no shoes, until That in the street I found a man who had no feet. Eddie Rickenbacker, who survived Twenty-one days on a liferaft lost in the Pacific Ocean, he understood very well Its meaning, as it was emphasized, after its rescue, by stating that if You have the water you need to drink and all the food you need to feed yourself, never You have to complain about anything. Those who have not survived a shipwreck or a similar tragedy, we disregard with Often the value of what we have in life. For Schopenhauer, one of the greatest Tragedies of our human condition is encoded in that bitter tendency not to think Almost never in what we have, but always in what we lack. And there are many who Only learn to live truly the moment they learn that they are going to die. But The one who does not stop grunting and protesting, not only risks his mental and physical health, But also your home, your business and your friends. Relativize the criticisms. When he was Prince of Wales, at his fourteenth birthday, King Edward VIII attended a Of a naval school in Denvonshire, where he received strict training. Some day, One of the officers found him crying and after investigating the causes, he knew that Some cadets had kicked him. The principal of the school called the boys and, after To clarify to them that the prince had not accused them, he asked them the reasons of the aggression. These then confessed that, when they were naval officers, they wanted to be able to say Who had kicked the king. A very eloquent response that reflects the hidden meaning Of criticism and aggression: if we are nobody for others, then we will not take The annoyance of molernos to sticks or of unloading against us his fiery arsenal of invectives. In short: behind every unjust criticism is hidden a hidden compliment. When someone stands out among the masses, they will never be safe from censorship. Others They will speak of him. And many times they will speak badly, driven by jealousy and envy. Schopenhauer synthesized it years ago: The vulgar enjoys immensely with the defects And the follies of the great men. The most violent and excessive aggressions, such as criticism Unjustified that always fall on every public person, do not generally say Nothing certain of the assaulted, but they do reveal great truths of the aggressor. No one can prevent them being unfairly criticized, but anyone can make the criticism Unjust fail to affect him. This was learned by Major Smedley Butler after many Years of suffering for the flood of reproaches that were thrown at him. Finally, Tanned by experience, could hold the following: When someone curses me now I do not even turn my head to see who is talking. What does anyone who fills Importance all the darts and arrows that throw you from afar? This does not mean that criticism should be avoided or criticized. On the contrary, in trials Well-meaning there is an inexhaustible source of wisdom and no one is perfect, all We need them to improve. But you must ignore the endless criticism Unjustified and systematically on anyone who stands out. There are two formulas of denoted scope to achieve this. One is condensed into the words By Matthew C. Brush, president of the American International Corporation: I have adopted Standard do everything the best I know and I can and then open my old umbrella and leave Let the rain fall upon him, and not upon me. The other was taught to Charles Schwab a Old German who worked in his steel workshops. After his peers Had thrown him into the river after a discussion about the war, Schwab approached him, who Muddy, and wanted to know what his reaction had been and how Had responded to his aggressors, to which the old man replied: I laughed and nothing else. Laugh and nothing more: you will see how quickly your opponents lose all argument and The promptness with which the quarrels fade. Basic techniques for dealing with people While one hundred and fifty New York police officers and officers fired on The floor where he was hiding “Two Pistols” Crowley, this legendary “murderer Of police, “considered one of the most dangerous criminals in history Of New York, wrote a letter addressed to Blood could be read: Under these clothes I have a tired but kind heart, a heart That it would not hurt anyone. These words, written by the same man who had shot In cold blood to so many policemen, they are the daily bread in the corridors of the prisons. Such seems to be human nature, and it would not be exaggerated to say that, out of every hundred people, Ninety-nine are incapable of criticizing themselves, no matter how great their mistakes: While maintaining an elevated image of themselves, blame others for guilt Of all evils. Because to the difficulty for self-criticism the facility To criticize others, taking advantage of the slightest pretext. If all people consider themselves so perfect and so good, then the possibility that Someone who receives the criticism with pleasure is infinitely small. Hence the criticism Is dangerous, because it damages the pride of others, affects their sense of importance And makes their resentment emerge. And it is not only dangerous, it is also useless, Instead of causing lasting changes, it puts the criticized in a defensive attitude and for The common, trying to justify itself. The renowned psychologist BF Skinner demonstrated with his experiments on behavior that An animal learns much faster when rewarded for good behavior than When he is punished for his bad behavior. And later studies have extended these Conclusions to humans. Instead of censoring people, we should try to Understand it. Anyone can criticize, censor and complain, and almost all fools do. But it takes character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving. After suffering an accident that almost cost him the life and that of his crew of Not for his expertise, Bob Hoover, a famous American pilot, personally reviewed The fuel tank and confirmed his suspicion that he had been charged with fuel Of reactor instead of common gasoline. He then went to the airport and asked to see the Mechanic in charge of the airplane. When he arrived, sick with anguish and conscious of His unforgivable mistake, Hoover did not scold him, nor even criticize him. He put his arm On his shoulders and said: To show him that I am sure he will never do it again, I want tomorrow to take care of my F-51. Sigmund Freud, the father of psychoanalysis, taught the following: Everything you and I do Arises from two motives: the sexual impulse and the desire to be great. In the same way, John Dewey, the noted American educator, argued that the deepest Human nature is the desire to be important. The best way to know and understand a Person is, therefore, in knowing how to satisfy that desire to be important. And just like some Was called “Admiral of the Ocean and Viceroy of the Indies”, and others have demanded That they be treated as “His Greatness, the most excellent Mr. President,” as well as insane asylums Are filled with subjects who have found in madness the importance that in sanity They have been denied. If some people are so thirsty for importance that they reach dementia, imagine for a moment The miracles that you can achieve by just offering your neighbor an honest appreciation Of its importance. Charles Schwab, the first president of the United States Steel Company, Who was skilled as few in this art, defined his success with these simple words: Si Something I like, I am warm in my approval and generous in my praise. Stop thinking about yourself for a few minutes and begin to observe the qualities of those who surround. Then you can recognize your strengths and appreciate them in a sincere way. And with the same Strictness with which it feeds the bodies of its children, can feed the esteem of all Their fellows. That was Emerson’s formula, whose personal prestige did not prevent him from proving Honored and sincere appreciation for other people: Every man I know is superior to me in Some sense. In that sense, I learn from him. You can earn more friends in two months by truly caring for them from the You could win in two years trying to get others interested in you. Does About twenty-two centuries, the Roman poet Publilio Syro already knew this mechanism: We care about others when they care about us. This is well known by dogs, Who manage to make a living by simply showing affection to their owners, because they know that Humans, regardless of any rank or hierarchy, like those who Admire them or simply rejoice in their company. Do the hello test The others with enthusiasm and enthusiasm, demonstrating the taste of them, and you can observe Results Even the most prestigious and busy people succumb to genuine interest in them. When Dale Carnegie ran a literature course at a Brooklyn institute, she wanted Invite some of the most recognized writers to give a lecture and present their ideas. To do this, he wrote a letter with his students expressing to each writer the Admiration they felt for their works and how much they would be interested to hear. Each letter Was signed by about one hundred and fifty people and in all of them it was said that they understood The difficulties to travel to the institute, but in any case they would appreciate Much if they wrote to them the answers to some questions. These writers So much liked the letter that they had no problem in leaving aside their tasks and arrive To Brooklyn. Actually, it’s not about anything new. This is what Zoroaster taught his disciples Persians three thousand years ago, just as Confucius preached in China, Buddha on the banks of the Ganges And Lao Tzu in the Valley of the Han. That is what Jesus taught in the mountains of Judea Almost twenty centuries ago: Do ​​to your neighbor what you want your neighbor to do to you. Almost everyone you stumble across feels superior to you in some sense; A sure way to reach the heart is and sincerely recognizes it. Disraeli, one of the most astute men who have ruled the British Empire, affirmed The following: Speak to people of yourselves and listen to them for hours. Always ask yourself what is in the other person that you can honestly admire and do not have Scruples in mentioning it. When Donald McMahon, a garden architect, In the house of a prestigious judge planning the restructuring of his garden, had the opportunity To meet his dogs and approached to say: Lord judge, you have a beautiful Hobby, then praising the animals and congratulating him for the prizes they had won. The effect was surprising. That same judge who had shown himself dry and distant Invited him to meet the kennel, spoke to him for an hour on the subject explaining the More thorough details and, in the end, before saying good-bye, asked if he had children And, in the affirmative, offered him a puppy as a gift. McMahon was enough With a simple comment to forge the friendship of the judge and, by the way, take home A puppy worth hundreds of dollars. If there is a secret of success, “said Henry Ford,” it lies in the ability to appreciate The point of view of the neighbor and see things from that point of view as well as from his own. If you want others to be interested in something, put yourself in your position, think about what Like them, talk to them about what they want and show them how to do it. Do like those parents Whose son had the bad habit of wetting the bed and always blamed his Grandmother, who slept with him. Instead of reprimanding him, they paused to reflect on which Were the wishes of the child. It was easy for them to understand that he wanted to feel older, and that meant having a bed Own and sleep in pajamas like his father. The mother took him to a tent so that he And, when he installed the bed in his room, in the midst of the emotion, his Father simply said, “You’re not going to wet this bed, are you?” Of course That no, replied the boy, rising up in pride and, in fact, the problem was overcome. When you want to get someone to do something, there will be only one way to do it And is to make that person want to do it, to make him understand the way in which that person Something may favor him. Trying to persuade someone to do something, limiting themselves To show him the advantages that something has for oneself, it will hardly be able to wake up Their enthusiasm. Every seller will be able to corroborate that the best way to convince someone To make a purchase is to inquire about your needs and offer you products Or services that help you solve your own problems. Get others to think like you Woodrow Wilson, President of the United States during World War I and Which played a crucial role in the resolution of the same – for which he was awarded With the Nobel Peace Prize -, stated the following: If you come to me with the I think I can promise you that mine will close faster than Yours, and added that when the approach is respectful and seeks a genuine dialogue, It will be quickly noticed that the differences between the two parties are never so great As was thought, and the points in common, on the other hand, are much larger than expected. Lincoln knew very well that more flies are caught with a drop of honey than with a barrel Of gall, and all the great anecdotes of his life contribute to corroborate his thought That softness and friendship are more powerful than fury and strength. If you want Prevent others from closing your doors, then approach them in a friendly, Even in front of those with whom he has reason to be annoyed. So when you talk to someone, do not start discussing the divergent points. For him Begin by emphasizing, and continuing to emphasize, all those things in which they are agree. Throughout the conversation, continue to emphasize common points And try to show that, in the end, the two pursue the same purposes. Each Yes you get from your interlocutor is a door that opens. Each not for the Contrary, it will be a difficult obstacle to overcome, because when someone gives a negative By answer, all your pride will require you to be consistent with yourself and hardly Will retract. Maybe he will understand later that this was not a mistake – he explains Professor Overstreet – but he has to take into account his precious pride anyway. Twenty-four centuries ago, as he wandered through the squares of Athens, Socrates set out to evidence The contradictions in which they incurred those who believed themselves to be the possessors of the truth. He He knew very well that if he came to them with criticism and refutations, none would be willing To dialogue with him and the exercise would be of little benefit. That is why Socrates simply asked questions. And I always started by asking those Things with which he knew that his interlocutor would agree. Then I kept winning One statement after another, accumulating an abundant number of yeses in their favor, until That at last, almost without realizing it, his adversary was coming to a conclusion that few Minutes earlier he would have strongly rejected. Socrates did not intend to assert his own truth. In fact, he himself repeated his Disciples his classic only know that I know nothing. If you still consider it to be more Intelligent than Socrates, and he is always right, so instead of wasting time Questioning the mistakes of others, should be enjoying the millions of dollars Which would guarantee the fact never to err, neither in bets nor in business. Although we have a strange tendency to think that, if we do not always The less we have it most of the time, in fact we are much more fallible than Which we are willing to accept. Just as we do not like our mistakes made Public, we have nothing to do with blaming others for their own faults. When, for example, you tell someone else you are wrong and then add I’m going to show you what it’s really like, what it’s insinuating is that you’re more Ready and she, before finishing her first sentence, will have already won an opponent. Only those who step softly go far. If it is imperative to correct another, Do it subtly, with such skill that no one thinks you are doing it. Even If you are sure that the other is wrong, you will find it much more profitable to start By a phrase like well, listen, I think of another way, although perhaps I am wrong. When someone makes a mistake, he sometimes admits it to himself. And if you know it Arrive softly and tactfully, you may admit it to others and even come to Take pride in their frankness and equanimity in doing so. Benjamin Franklin, one of the More able men and diplomats of American history, wrote: The form Modest in which he expounded my opinions, he was looking for a sooner and shorter reception contradiction. Very little is obtained from a discussion, be it with a client, with the spouse or with Some adversary. RV Crowley, a salesman for a large New York timber company, Came to understand one day that his company lost a lot of money because of the discussions That he was winning. If what you want is to gain affection or respect or friendships, then it is preferable that you Refrain from winning fights Remember these wise words of Alexander Pope: It must be taught To men as if they were not being taught, and to propose unknown things as if they were Forgotten You may not win a public recognition for your genius, but if you succeed Other people to take ownership of their own ideas, then Greater possibility of being realized. The words spoken by the Chinese sage Lao Tzu For twenty-five centuries, this attitude has been taken up and they contain an incomparable wisdom: Reason By which the rivers and the seas receive the homage of a hundred torrents of the mountain Is that they are kept below them. Anyway, nobody likes to be forced to do so To do things and we all prefer to do things that we feel as our own. This was what Eugene Wesson understood after losing countless contracts for his eagerness Of originality. Every time I visited one of the great designers of New York, Wesson, Which sold models for textile manufacturing, was leaving without making any sales. After A hundred attempts, this man decided to change his strategy: went to a buyer With half-finished drawings and asked him to help him finish them. The buyer told him to leave them there for a few days and, after these, he gave Some indications on how best to complete them. Wesson returned with the drawings Finishes to present them again. All of them were accepted by the client. Since That moment, this designer was enough to let his client feel that the ideas Were his to have guaranteed the most constant and lucrative contract of his life. In the same way that people prefer to do what they consider to be theirs, people Are also inclined to those alternatives that they consider more noble. Therefore, if your Purpose is to influence someone’s behavior, pause for a moment to think In a good and dignified motive by which a person would perform a certain action, and Show it that way. So Cyrus HK Curtis did before becoming A prestigious publisher: for his magazine to obtain articles from prestigious writers To whom it was not in a position to pay a reasonable sum, merely offered them A check of a hundred dollars that would not go for them, but for a charity. Also, when Lord Northcliffe found in the newspapers a photograph of him that did not Wanted to be published, wrote a letter to the director, and after talking about respect and The love we all have for the mother, said: I beg you not to publish again That photograph of me. My mother does not like it. Simple Techniques for Leadership A good leader knows how to draw attention to others’ mistakes and influence their behaviors, Indirectly and subtly, avoiding the angry reactions and resentments that can provoke In many people criticism or direct orders. The practical examples that are presented Then collect some valuable techniques to ensure that others want to cooperate, Instead of rebelling. On one occasion, while Charles Schwab was passing through one of the metallurgical workshops To his charge, found a group of workers smoking under a sign that said Prohibido smoke. His reaction, then, was exemplary; Instead of rebuking them, he approached them And offered a cigarette to each one, saying to them warmly: “I will thank you very much, my friends, That smoke these outside. It is a simple matter of tact, which makes communication effective At all levels. When Lyman Abbot was invited to deliver a speech on the occasion of the death of Prominent Henry Ward Beecher, wrote with great care some solemn words, Which, when completed, read to his wife. Although she realized that the discourse Was very poor and could only get yawning in the auditorium, he merely suggested So complimentary that this speech would be an excellent article for a literary magazine. Abbot immediately understood it, tore the papers and on the day of the ceremony he pronounced An effusive preaching without even using notes for it. In some cases, the best way to correct another person is to refer first To their own mistakes before criticizing those of the other, since for any person will be Much easier to listen to a list of your own shortcomings when it comes from someone Who has admitted, with humility, his own. This was very well known to EG Dillistone, an engineer from Brandon, in Canada, who knew that a Simple reprimand would not be enough for his new secretary to stop incurring so many spelling mistakes. He, like many engineers, had personally faced To that problem and for that reason had decided to use a small alphabetized notebook in which I wrote down the correct way to write certain words. Thus, to the next letter plagued with faults, he approached his secretary and, after telling him Who had found a word he thought was badly written, explained that he himself always He had problems with that word; So he told him, then that was why he had A small personal dictionary, which he took out of his pocket to consult the Form of the term. Dillistone never knew if she had copied her system, But the truth is that the errors started to decrease in an accelerated way. Instead of giving orders and imposing reprimands, a leader knows how to motivate others with Guidelines, asking the right questions and arousing their motivation. This was what Which made Ian Macdonald, CEO of a small business specializing in parts For machines, when he received a lucrative offer for a very large order, but with A deadline so limited that it would be difficult to meet. Before accepting and signing The contract, Macdonald convened a general meeting and explained to his employees the Situation, clarifying the benefits that the company would Accept this proposal. He then asked them if they came up with any ideas On how to adjust the production processes to arrive to fulfill the delivery. Everybody The employees then contributed their opinions and assumed the challenge as their own, feeling That they could do it. In effect, the contract was accepted and the parts manufactured and delivered On the agreed date. Finally, if you do not want to gain the enmity or resentment of the other, let him always save Its prestige. On one occasion, the General Electric Company found itself in the painful obligation To remove Charles Steinmetz from the direction of the calculations department, for, although He was a genius of the first order in everything related to electricity, his Work in that managerial position was being deplorable. The problem was that the company did not want to lose a man under any circumstances So valuable, and to make matters even more complicated, everyone knew that it was Of a very sensitive person. Then they came up with a magnificent idea. They offered To Steinmetz the pompous position of “Consulting Engineer of the General Electric Company”, Allowing him to leave the position he had been occupying and remained in the company Doing what he was a most outstanding figure and, in passing, saving his own Reputation to feel that as a homage. In conclusion The prestigious psychologist Alfred Adler, disciple of Freud, maintained the following: The individual Who is not interested in his fellow men is the one who has the greatest difficulties in life And causes the greatest hurts to others. From these individuals all failures arise . Often our own individualistic blindness inclines us to neglect relations with The others in the strenuous attempt to achieve our goals. But if they have in common all these guidelines to face everyday situations And to have a placid and valuable life, is the way in which they emphasize the importance of assuming The perspective of the other; Without sacrificing its own authenticity, in the same attempt To satisfy the legitimate interests of others we can achieve our own goals

1 comment on “Disfrutar la vida mientras trabajamos | Como ser feliz y disfrutar de tu trabajo | Dale Carnegie

  1. Aldo Saracco Post author

    Hola, espero se encuentre muy bien, donde puedo encontrar el libro completo o el audiolibro, aun que debo felicitarlo por el excelente trabajo que realizo de sintesis


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